"What do I do if I'm head over heels with my best friend?"
This is what I want to google and get an answer to. Unfortunately for me, Google doesnt give such answers.. Especially it doesnt help when there's a subcomment: seems like he's not that into me.
Well, they write that when a man wants smth from you, he'll do anything to get you.
I cant decide whether to agree with it or not. On one hand - yes, if he wants, he's gonna do it. If he doesnt do - he's not that into me.
On the other hand.. Well, I've been keeping my distance for soooo long, seriously garding our friendship a lot, not letting even slightest flirt come across and ruin it.
What do I want now? Especially when I know it's not good "sky" time to start anything, we'd anyway have to wait till September.
However now I'm scared he might fall in love with smb else while we're away from each other. I shouldnt worry though: I might fall in love myself and more than that, O. is not a kind of a person to fall in love with smb so easily. To be honest, I cant even imagine him with anybody (from my position as a friend).
But I can imagine him with me.
Damn it, smth feels so strange. There's definitely not much passion between us. Havent I had enough of passionate relationship where we ended up being completely different? Isnt it important that I can be myself around this person, make jokes at him, laugh at myself, be talkative and not, everything.
As friends, we are great.
And other people often made hints that we should be together or just gave us curios looks.
It always seemed to me that it was me who kept distance.
And now I needed time to think.
And I did.
And now I think that maybe it's just that he's not that much into me.
Breathe in, breathe out.
We'll see each other this weekend. And then 6 weeks apart.